There’s a line I love in a poem called ‘Tell Them’ by Carvens Lissaint:

“Tell them I never spoke unless it improved upon silence,

Tell them I never moved unless it improved upon stillness.” 

I think there’s some really good advice in that line. We often think things need a reaction or a response, when they don’t. We spend precious energy coming up with stuff to say just to avoid silence. Sometimes we do it so much, it takes away from the things that we actually do need to say. I know this much: I want to be the type of person who speaks carefully, so that when I do speak, people listen.

And the only way to do that is to not be frivolous with my words. Don’t say things I don’t mean. Always follow through on the things I do say. And certainly don’t tell lies.

. . . but!

Once you eliminate everything that doesn’t need to be said, you’ve eliminated an awful lot. Maybe most things don’t need to be said, but silly jokes and pointless stories certainly have their role in life. The phrase “Silence is Golden'' implies we ought to only say what must be said. I don't know about that.

I have several blank white walls in my apartment. Their blankness doesn’t bother me much. I could easily fill them with a bunch of bullshit, but a bunch of bullshit probably would bother me. I do have a few worthwhile pieces of art hanging up. I consider a worthwhile piece of art to be anything that improves upon a blank space. And yet, art is by definition something that isn't a necessity. So while I don’t need to hang any art up, a good piece will still make the blank wall better than it was before. And just like that, some words really are better spoken. A kind thought or a nagging concern. A random dream. A dumb joke.

Especially a dumb joke.

Most of us don’t say thoughts like these out loud. And sure, they don’t need to be said. But I fear we ironically hold back the thoughts that people could relate to most. And just because something doesn’t need to be said doesn't mean it couldn’t add a welcome splash of color to the wall.